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22 listopadu caterpillers and butterflies"What the caterpillar calls the end of the world,
the Master calls the butterfly." This statement was like a haunting melody that persisted in my mind and would not let go. And during one of the lowest and darkest days of my life, the meaning of this statement came alive to me. It was like a soothing balm during this painful time. It provided me with hope, that even though it was a dark time, it could give me new life when it was over. It could be the very catalyst that could change me through this growth time. My attitude changed from "Why me Lord" to :Walk with me Lord." It is amazing what a change of attitude can do and how much lighter the load becomes whn you know that the Lord is walking with you. I believe that our loving heavenly Father does ALLOW us to walk through the dark times, so that we can grow. That we can put our life and trust in Him. And like the caterpillar, wrapping itself in a dark, solitary cocoon and not knowing what will occur, there is a level of trust knowing that it is not an ending but a new beginning. And there comes the day, when the dark cocoon is no longer needed, for from the cocoon, an amazing transformation has taken place. And the caterpillar can no longer return to where and what is was, but now is blessed and changed into something greater than what it was. And like the caterpillar, often the dark times in our lives is exactly what a loving heavenly Father is allowing to change and transform us. And more importantly, to change our focus from the problem we are encountering--to the ONE who has the solution all along. From John Venturella  Another letter from Papa JohnA GRACE FILLED BLESSING As a parent, I love being a father to my three children. However, in the role of father, there is also the primary responsibility of the financial breadwinner when raising a family. This sometimes meant having two jobs and not having all the time you wished to spend with your children. But this role, was and is still a blessing in my life. Over the years, I have been blessed as eleven grandchilren came into my life. I always thought that fatherhood was great but grandfathering is pure joy. Time with the grandkids is always pure excitement and joy. There is always something to learn, some new item, some new discovery; and beyond all of this is the bonding of these children to my heart. My daugther and son in law have five of the grandchildn, who are living in the same town as me, less than a mile away, What a gift to have the grandkids nearby. My daughter and son in law also have had a miscarriage with twins and one child named Grace who was born for only 2 days. Three other grandchildren live in California and Arizona. What a gift it is to have grandkids nearby. One of my daughter's children is with her Heavenly Grandfather- her name is Grace. She lived within her mother for eight months and was born on October 19, 2000. My daughter, son in law and her brothers and sisters wished she could have given her our breath to help her breathe, so she could continue to live. But it did not turn out that way. Her congenital diaphragmatic hernia caused her organs to move resulting in Grace's inability to breath. In her life within her mother's womb, and in her two day's of life, this small treasure called Grace brought family, friends and even strangers together in prayer. Both at pre-birth and the hours of her birth, these prayers comforted the family as Grace continued to sturggle for her life. Her small body could not sustain the struggle and she went to her Heavenly grandfather, one day after her birth on October 20, 2001 Our dream of course was to love this child through birthdays, school days, career days, marriage if she chose, etc. But it was not meant to be. Grace who had a hole in her diaphrahm left a hole in our hearts that only she can fill. And with her very short life comes the realization that she is out of pain and fully healed by the "grace" of her Creator. There is also great comfort in knowing that we will be together in some future time. For we were definitely "graced" by Grace. In loving memory of Grace Dill from her grandfather. John Venturella 21 listopadu Coping with loss~when a loved one dies you usually don't experience that loss just once. You're likely to relive it on the anniversary of your loved one's death. Chances are, you're also reminded of your loss each time a special date comes up such as a holiday or birthday. Even special events for strangers who died( ie., 911, vets day) can trigger that familiar pain and sadness all over again.
Speaking from experience, as we have lived thru 7 birthdays for our angel Grace, the days leading up to the date can bring forth very sad feelings as well as anger over our child not being here when many people are given perfectly healthly children whom they abuse. I, as well as many of my friends who have lost a child, remember the date our daughter was diagnosed with her CDH. We remember the month her trisomy was revealed. We remember the funeral.
Some reminders are inevitable. There will alot of 1sts. The 1st holiday after your baby died. The first painful mother's day with out your child. Personally the holidays , Thanksgiving and Christmas used to be so happy for me. But they serve as a painful reminder that a child is missing from our arms. It hurts. Please contact me at dill6@cox.net if you would like to talk....
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